


A Harbor In The Tempest

by mudxhoney



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M, NHL RPF, National Hockey League, RPF
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2019-10-09 04:45:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17400269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mudxhoney/pseuds/mudxhoney
Summary: Hii! RPF is not my forte - so please extend patience and understanding my way.This is a multi-part that's more a collection of vignettes more than concrete chapters showcasing the relationship between the two players. Installments can be read as a standalone because they won't be in sequence.  Though not verbatim, installments all pertain to the same Universe and should make sense *cross fingers*.Please mind the Mature Rating - that I will use across the board - just to be on the safe side.





	1. The Furious Tides

Jimmy Vesey – free agent and Harvard Graduate.

The name is familiar to Brady because it's been thrown around so carelessly this past summer and a half. According to the Local Vine and other players, Jimmy is the kid that turned back on his word. Press traitor. Corporate rat. Weasel. Brady takes all that he hears in stride. Technically there was nothing wrong with what this person did. The system is set up with loopholes - no use crying if someone actually uses them.

Brady knows this and that part of him that clings tight to small town sensibility allows him to extend compassion despite not having seen him or met Jimmy in person. 

Beyond the talk and speculation, he wonders if most of the so-called experts remember that Jimmy's also a kid, like him, fresh out of college and very much dependent on the advice of people he trusts. Brady doesn't care if Jimmy's from Harvard, therefore, the owner of a brilliant mind. A kid is a kid. He's pretty sure that he can't navigate a supermarket confidently without his Mom around. That's just how it is. That's how it will be.

The fact that he's heard some people in the locker room say that Jim's going to join the Rangers -- piques his curiosity. It is a possibility because he is a good friend of Kevin Hayes and Corporate has asked the help of the Rangers' glitzy fanbase for help in enticing the Harvard grad to their side. Brady's seen the posts and though it's probably wonderful to have that attention, he's sure that it can also be inconvenient. He wonders about it for a little longer before he sets it aside to make his way to practice. 

_There’s got to be a reason, a good reason for people to do what they do. Decide what they decide._

 

*

 

The meeting room is small, probably reserved for administrative employees than a big-name players. 

No offense taken as Brady's well aware of their status as rookies. They're introduced to one another, given some guidelines, schedules and told that formal training and introductions to the regulars will take place some time next week. To say that Brady's excited for today is overkill, sure he's looking forward to it but not to the point of being nervous or putting out a jittery kind of energy. If anything, Brady's proud that he's calm. Looking at Jimmy from across the table - he can see that the other player's taking a cue from him. 

He's shy, looks down a lot, threads his fingers unsure of what to do with his interesting hands.

So, Brady just keeps his expression neutral and his voice even. It doesn't come through as unfriendly, he hopes it's welcoming in that gentle, less obtuse way.

Shaking hands with people is no big hardship for him and in his mind he says at last he meets Jimmy Vesey.

Brady is comforted in the knowledge that he's right - that Jimmy's just like him, a kid in New York City, sticking out like a sore thumb, then again this city is so full of those that it's the odd kind of normal. He sees a lot in Jimmy, eagerness, drive, hunger - to prove himself - to all his detractors, that he's made the right choice, that he's going to work his hardest to show everyone that he's got a right to be here, same as he's got the right to refuse other teams.

Jimmy looks tired, though. There's a weariness in his eyes - maybe residual exhaustion from the summer's clusterfuck. Brady cuts through all that with a smile and offers his hand. 

To say that there's an instant connection between them is an understatement. They click in the way juvenile wolf cubs click, the way they huddle close because they know that they haven't seen anything - like playing at the highest level of their sport - this yet. There is an eloquence there that speaks for both of them - _we should stick together, because if we do we might just survive this._

The moment their hands touch - he feels a part of Jimmy _breathe_ as if he's been constantly inhaling, waiting for some backlash. Brady has none of that because Jimmy's armor's worn thin and he can see some cracks here and there. He shakes Jimmy's hand harder as if saying - LOOK ALIVE, WE'RE ALIVE and WE'RE IN NEW YORK. And Jimmy chuckles at this and looks down, but he responds in kind, shaking back and pulling Brady for the customary shoulder bump.

“Nice to meet you, I'd heard from Kevin about you.” Jimmy opens with genuine interest.

“Only the good stuff I hope.” Brady smiles and pulls away to induct Jimmy to the reality of private handshakes. 

When they pull apart - Brady has to do a double take because there's a look on Jimmy's face that makes his insides hurt. A look of gratitude, wholehearted acceptance of a kindness, that Brady's sure, was far and few this past summer. Jimmy doesn't have to say anything more because Brady gets it, the way he gets the weather. It's common sense, to know that people get hurt if you hurt them, they ache if you hurt them intentionally. Jimmy might never speak of it, but that's okay because that was last summer. 

Right now is different. In that small meeting room it's just them and their ticket to the future in the sport they both love is wide open.

Jimmy looks like he's insightful and he's looking at Brady and then he smiles.

“How do you pronounce your last name again? I just want to get it right.” Jimmy asks earnestly and it makes Brady smile. "You know how to pronounce it, it's not that hard!"

They both laugh.

That evening Brady follows Jimmy on Instagram and Twitter; within minutes Jimmy follows back.


	2. Magnanimity

“Did you really ask to house with Brady? I thought you and I were sharing an apartment?” 

Kevin's voice sounds a little frustrated on the phone and Jimmy looks stressed as he glances at Brady because he takes the call in the living room.

Kevin sounds like Jimmy’s solely accountable for this inconvenience. 

Brady observes all this from the couch and he shrugs it off like one of those things. Kevin and Jimmy have known one another for a long time, his input really isn't needed in this situation.

“I didn't just ask, Kev. I'm already moved in and it's more like my apartment and I asked Brady to share the rent with me. I didn't get a formal invite from you and I didn't want to impose. Your Dad visits often – so it all works out, yeah?” 

It's the most Brady's heard Jimmy speak and the loudest too. 

Quite understandable that Jimmy's irritable since they're tired from this housing situation debacle, the stress of moving in and integrating with the team via practices and late night excursions.

“Yeah. I'll see you at practice and it's just a big misunderstanding, Kev. Sorry about that.”

When Jimmy hangs up, he pads to the small dining space by the windows and looks out at the bright city lights. He sets his phone down and exhales – probably getting his bearings together.

Brady shifts and looks at him - “You okay, Jimmy?” With that he stand up and walks to where Jimmy is and puts a hand on his shoulder, giving it a supportive squeeze. It's useless to do much introspection regarding this matter. It's just an apartment. There's always next year. Brady's just a little concerned on Jimmy's behalf because once again it looks like he's taking it upon himself. All these faults and all these misscommunication.

“Thanks, Bray.”

“Anytime. You sure you're good?”

“Yeah, It's all good. He had three months to clarify that whole living situation that's all.”

“I know. Though, you could have asked him again?”

“The invite needed to come from him. It's his place.”

“Of course. Sorry it didn't work out Jimmy. Maybe next year?” 

Brady says it so plainly, so innocently, so when he looks at Jimmy and he sees his veiled expression – a subtle hurt on his boyish face, he is taken aback. 

“Hey...” 

Jimmy cuts him off.

“I think part of me didn't want to live with him for now anyway. It all works out.” Jimmy says quietly and reaches to lay his hand where Brady's is on his shoulder. Then Jimmy smiles a little, pulls back and walks to the kitchen to get himself a bottled water. 

 

*

 

It's a little past five when Brady knocks on Jimmy's door and tells him that they need a couple of things from the store. Their house is so bare that it wouldn't hurt to give it some extra love and content. Jimmy looks a little panicked at the mention of a home goods store but he schools his face and stands up from where he's been chilling out on his bed, pulls out his headphones and sets it aside.

“It's JUST the home goods store and the grocery.” Brady clarifies. 

Jimmy finally smiles - “I know that!” - nods and follows his lead.

“What were you listening to?” Brady opens.

“Podcast. Funny girls from California – My Favorite Murder.” Jimmy looks sheepish as he says this but not sorry in the very least. The podcast is entertaining after all.

“I'm surprised it's not a hockey podcast.” Brady smiles and does not look the least bit offended at the information that Jimmy's just shared with him. He's heard of the podcast – from his mother no less.

“I do sometimes like to venture into other things.” Jimmy puts on his cap, a cue that he's ready to go.

“Good to know, Ves.” Brady grins and opens the door...

“I'm definitely a Karen.” Brady quips.

Jimmy laughs and in his head he knows that he's a Georgia.

 

*

 

It's at Bed, Bath and Beyond that Brady realizes that Jimmy's a bit of a princess. A little too sheltered and surprisingly adorable. He has these little nuances that had Brady do double takes and secret smiles: The way his brow scrunches as he examines something that he needs but isn’t quite appealing to his eyes. The confused expression on his face when he is asked by any attendant for his preferences in color, size, firmness level of – throw pillows -- like he’s always had these decisions made for him or he never had to make them to begin with. The way he looks at Brady - the way he looks _to_ him for approval when it comes to the most communal things to put in their apartment; shower curtain, throw blankets, rugs, a kettle.

“What do you think?”

“I think it’s okay. Our walls are white, it’s not going to matter much.”

Jimmy keeps staring at the mid-sized rug in one hand and the teal one in the other, probably for their living room and then he frowns — teal, brown, cream, black or gray. After much deliberation - they settle on gray.

“I think it's a good choice.” Brady says.

“Yeah.” Jimmy sounds a little uncertain. “You're not going to get mad if the rug does not turn out well, right?”

Brady looks a little offended “It's a rug, Jimmy.” And as if to punctuate that he pushes Jim's hand away and offers his card to purchase everything they've chosen.

Jimmy looks a little surprised but he looks away and smiles.

“Just these for tonight, gentlemen?” The cashier asks.

“Hi, yup, all these please. Anything the missus wants.” Brady jokes.

Jimmy for all intents and purposes has his back to Brady and is looking at some other display. He listens to their banter, he does not miss that joke – but when he turns around he feigns innocence and pretends he did not hear.


	3. Better

Jimmy does not notice it at first – the game is so fast paced that one's line of vision follows the movement and not the stagnant. When makes space for Kevin to sit beside him – huffing from his last shift – he welcomes his friend with a tight smile.

“Might've cut Skjei's face open.” Kevin says.

Jimmy's eyes shift from Kevin and then he sees Brady being attended to by the Team Doctor. There's a game to play, a game to win, so he can only watch from the corner of his eye what's going on. Sure, he's worried, but they are hockey players at the highest level of the sport. So he pushes it aside for now.

They lose to the Blackhawks by a point and no one's really in the mood to go out. Jimmy opts to go home and while on the train with Kevin, he shoots Brady a text.

The reply comes immediately and it's a picture attachment and a thumbs up.

Jimmy shows Kevin and Kevin shakes his head – clearly feeling bad about it.

“I clearly damaged my ultimate Man Rocket's face. I'm sad Jimmy. I really am.” But it's the sport they love and the sport they play. Jimmy smiles and moves a bit closer when Kevin slings an arm around his shoulders – clearly seeking support from his friend.

 

*

Brady looks up from the his iPad when he hears keys jangle from outside the front door. He knows it's Jimmy so he smiles when the other man walks through their threshold. 

Jimmy gives him an apologetic smile before setting his things on the floor.

Brady's face is mostly numb but parts of him are beginning to hurt. He reciprocates and closes his eyes when he feels Jimmy's fingers in his hair, shuffling through in a comforting manner. 

“Did they give you meds for the pain?” Jimmy asks sitting beside Brady.

“Sure did. I have a schedule.”

“Let me see.” Jimmy takes the paper with printed on instructions from Brady and he reads through it and sighs. “Shouldn't be too bad but you can't take these on an empty stomach even if it's in the middle of the night.”

“Will crackers do?” Brady asks.

“Yeah and maybe pudding.”

None of which they have. They know this and they look at one another and laugh.

“I can make a run to the convenience store. We have one just around the corner.” Jimmy says like it's the most logical thing in the world. It probably is.

“Thank you. I mean, you don't have to but thank you.” Brady says.

Jimmy walks to their front door and looks back - “Kev really feels bad about cutting you. He'll most likely call you tomorrow, just because it's such Kevin thing to do.”

And Brady knows it. Thinks nothing of it because it's all part of the game and that he kind of expected to hear something like this from Jimmy.

“Nah. It's all good.”

Jimmy nods and turns the knob.

“Jimmy...”

“Yeah?”

“I hope you're not doing this on Kevin's behalf, because you feel bad...”

“Uh, no. I'm doing this for you. Because I'm the best roommate. Ever.”

Brady makes no pretenses and laughs at that – continues laughing even as Jimmy closes the door. He's feeling better, so much better.


	4. Hopry and Sly Rye

"Do you want to get food after this?"

"Dinner sounds good."

"Dinner it is."

 

They're both tired after the game with the Predators and Brady knows that it's a baptism of fire for his roommate. He keeps the conversation light and clear of Hockey. He ventures into the weird and wonderful world of Stranger Things. Just something to pull Jimmy out of the protective shell he put around himself since they landed in Nashville.

“I don't know if I want to go out, though. Not...not that I think that it's not safe but because I'm just going with the vibe of it. I know where I'm not wanted.”

Brady wants to point out the duality of the situation, the hurt pride of an obviously proud city and the fact that Nashville wouldn't feel hurt if they think that Jimmy is dispensable, forgettable. Zuccarello said so himself when he approached Jimmy before game time and stared him in the face.

But Brady's also going with the vibe and he doesn't say anything except a solution to their predicament.

“Room service, then?”

“Too shut in. We are not shut-ins.” Jimmy protests.

“Hotel restaurant?”

“People...”

“Jimmy...come on man, throw me a bone here.”

“Okay, okay. Room service.”

And just as they agree on it – the phone rings and Jimmy's sitting closest to it so he answers. It's Kevin and he's asking if they want to go out because he knows a good spot to drink and dine. Brady watches Jimmy's face and see a multitude of emotion pass – reluctance, joy and eventually there is relenting. But Brady's there and he speaks in the background. 

“Kev, we're pretty beat, yeah? We were thinking room service.”

Kevin is quiet for a beat before he adds - “Ves?”

Jimmy looks at Brady and it takes a lot out of him to speak and agree with Brady.

“Yeah, I'll stay in and it's pretty late anyway...”

“Yeah but there's this girl I went to college with and she lives here now.”

Jimmy's face clouds over and just like that a mask falls shut over his features. Brady narrows his eyes and wonders why that is.

“Oh well, have fun then.” Jimmy supplies and quickly hangs up.

Brady does not ask – it's not his business – he just grabs the booklet with the menu and plops next to Jimmy and shoves it gently against his forearm. 

“Hurry up and order because it's late and I am getting sleepy.” Brady says gently.

“I know what you mean. Let me see...” 

 

*

 

“I have to admit that the pulled pork sandwich is life changing. An actual religion.” Brady says and unceremoniously slumps in the armchair that he's occupying. Across from him Jimmy laughs and attempts to finish the last bits of his meal. Something simple and nothing quite intimidating as pulled pork.

“How's that Mac n' Cheese, Ves?” Brady chuckles.

“It's very cheesy.” Jimmy supplies and looks pleased when Brady starts laughing.

Between them they have two bottles of beer each from Tennessee's Yazoo – hopry and sly rye – both of which taste good and relaxing the way beer's consumed these days. None of the macho-laden consumption. These days it's all about the taste and the ingredients and the reviews and the concern of which is the best for what meal. 

It's beer not wine. 

The thought makes Jimmy laugh and it catches Brady's attention.

“What?”

“I was just thinking that this beer's good but what I'd give for a Sam Adams right about now.”

Brady laughs at that, he looks at Jimmy through the shade of his snapback, then he laughs some more.

 

*

When Jimmy gets out of the shower and he's toweling off his buzzed hair – he sees that Brady's already situated and snoozing on the bed closest to the window. He smiles at that and sets the towel he's holding aside and sits on his bed, he can't help the audible yawn he gives because he's wired but tired and the game was brutal from a humane point of view.

Not one person wants to be called a liar unless they intended to lie. It was never his intention – sometimes things just turn out differently and a different road to a dream opens up. It's hard to rely on good intentions, sure, but at least he made a decision. It was just impossible not to step on somebody's toes in the process.

Dante Aligheri once said that the hottest place in hell is reserved for people who refused to decide and take a stand at a time of great moral crisis. And he gets it. It's just that – it wasn't a great moral crisis last summer. 

It was his future. His heart.

Jimmy's mobile phone rings and he reaches for it quietly so as not to wake Brady.

“Jimbo.”

“Yeah, Kev.”

“She is so hot. I think I just had an out of body experience.” Kevin sounds so over the moon. It must have been a good time and it's nice to hear Kevin happy.

Jimmy is tired but Kevin wants to talk, so he gets up and sits down on the armchair, watching Nashville's beautiful city lights as Kevin shares some details about his night. He lets him talk, half listening and half-zoning out. Because this situation is funny and every time Kevin laughs, he can't help but smile.

When Kevin's finally all talked out and says his goodbye – Jimmy sets his phone down and rests his head for a while, clearly exhausted.

“You should have told him you were tired.”

He looks to Brady with a start - “Thought you were sleeping. Did I wake you?”

“Nah. Light sleeper.”

“Sorry.”

Brady sits up and sighs deep – slowly waking up more.

“You make a lot of allowances for Kevin.” Said as a statement of observation.

Jimmy does not miss the intent and he looks away – from far away – Nashville seems so kind. Then he nods, he nods helplessly.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.”


	5. He's in control

The wind is frigid and temperature unforgiving when their bus drives through the city limits. Seeing the familiar lights and the sleeplessness that New York City offers is a comforting thing, specially for tired hockey players that've just come in from an average road trip.

Brady exhales and fixes his snapback, sits up a bit before looking back to where Jimmy is dozing off beside Kevin. He snoops a little and notices that Kevin's sleeping as well with his phone resting on his chest. Jimmy's leaning a little beside him and his own cap is masking his eyes.

It's been a tiring week and Brady's ready to shower in his own bathroom and sleep in his own bed.

Speaking of, his new bed should have been delivered while he was on the road. He can't wait to enjoy it because his current mattress is old and needs to be retired. 

Brady sits back properly and tries to focus on that one creature comfort instead of entertaining a stray discomfort of seeing Jimmy so relaxed against Kevin. They're a team. It's not a big deal.

It's not a big deal until it isn't.

 

*

The bus parks at Madison Square Garden where the town cars and various driving services are waiting for the players. Kevin has his car parked and is the designated driver for the three of them. They all live downtown and car pooling isn't such a hardship at this time of night.

 

*

"Why is the new mattress out here, they should have taken out my old one replaced it..." Brady says incredlously as he sets his keys on the counter.

Jimmy walks in after him, a little disoriented and mostly apathetic to the situation.

"Can we worry about that tomorrow. Really have no energy to care tonight. I'm going to bed."

Brady slaps Jimmy's shoulder gently, fully understanding how tired his friend is. He watches him disappear in his room before reappearing with a more awake expression.

"Jimmy?"

"MY BED IS GONE." Jimmy stammers sounding a lot annoyed and partially in disbelief. "I should have locked my room so delivery won't get confused!"

"What do -" Brady cuts himself off and walks to where Jimmy's room is only to find it bare with just the dresser and hamper on the far side.

There is no bed frame, no mattress. The pillows were left on the floor so carelessly and it irked Brady because - at least leave them on the couch or something. 

Manners maketh man.

Urgh.

"What the fuck." Brady finally says and runs his hand through his hair before turning to face Jimmy.

"I'll call them tomorrow. I swear they're going to get an earful." Brady then walks to his room and finds it the same as he left it.

Jimmy's quietly picking up his pillows and walking to the couch. He's going to get some sleep, even if it's on the damn couch because he's tired. He's a little hungry but he's plenty more tired. 

"Ves, let's just replace this old mattress with the new one then crash on my bed. With me. I mean obviously with me but it's a big bed." Brady wonders why he's grasping for words and that this is just coming out in a panic.

Luckily, Jimmy's more in that bone-tired zone so he could care less about semantics. "Sure. As long as I get sleep. I don't mind the couch. I just want to sleep."

"I know buddy. It's just, it's my fault so let's get this sorted so you can sleep on a decent bed."

"You own it, it's not decent." Jimmy jokes a little but it leaves Brady wanting more of that crooked smile.

 

*

 

Changing the mattress takes about twenty minutes, fitting it with clean sheets takes ten and pillows takes another ten.

When Brady's all squeaky clean and showered, he finds Jimmy already sleeping on the side nearest the window in a white tshirt and heather sweatpants. He's laying on his stomach and facing the window.

Brady thinks of putting some pillows between them and make sure he stays on his side but the fact that he's already categorizing his and Jimmy's side is making his head hurt and he really does not want to think about it.

When they sort this out tomorrow, Jimmy's no longer going to sleep in his bed. Tonight was just an unfortunate thing that's left him glad in the heart.

Brady Skjei settles on his side of the bed, no pillows between him and Jimmy. He lays down and watches the ceiling for a good few before turning to look at Jimmy.

"Goodnight, Jimbo."

No answer.

Brady reaches out, only to stop before his fingers touch Jimmy's hair. No one has to know. Absolutely no one, but he holds on to control, pulls back his hand and turn the other way.

His lingering thought before sleep claims him -- _I wish I could._


	6. The Inevitable Folly

It's a good morning, Brady thinks. 

His legs feel great and his arms as fluid and accurate as they'll ever be. Breakfast with Jimmy and Kevin was fun as they were joined by a couple more teammates and the conversation really just flowed. It feels like they've truly integrated well and it can only get better.

Brady, for the life of him, is able to ignore the feelings that keep surfacing when Jimmy's around. That inexplicable need to surround him, watch over him. He's confused in the sense that he's mostly not this concerned with people in general. He's also concerned that he might be confusing pity with genuine affection. 

Brady needs to be sure.

Being sure requires a lot of introspect.

Kevin and Jimmy in serious talk at the benches is distracting Brady, specially when Jimmy leans in close, cocks his head to the side and laughs. 

Laughs at something Kevin says. It's enviable how Kevin can make almost everyone laugh. Brady's eyes linger -- a puck grazes his side and he looks up because that was a close one.

"Pay attention!" A member of the coaching staff calls out. And Brady gestures an apology before skating close to the sidelines.

Yeah, introspect, is something he can't do for the mean time.

 

*

 

"Tell me again why I need to go out tonight? I'm tired as all hell from practice and meetings with Coach." Jimmy says as he lays in his bed, glorious in his pajamas and tshirt. Brady tries not to look to long and he shifts in place, frowning a little at the floor.

"It's because everyone's going and we have no game tomorrow, practice starts in the afternoon and because we're in New York. We should live a little." Brady supplies and a part of him is guilty because he knows that Kevin had asked him to kindly convince Jimmy to join them. "Everyone knows you'd rather do your own thing, but let's just go. Show up there. We can always just bail afterwards."

Jimmy looks like he is pondering and he is very enticing in his silence -- stretched out on his bed, relaxed and face soft. He is placid like a lake in the summer. 

Brady is only human and he gives in to his wants and moves to plant himself beside Jimmy - face down and exhaling loud. He moves only his neck so he is facing his friend. "Come on. Do it for me, Jimmy."

For all intents and purposes, Brady does not expect Jimmy to give in. Specially since he worded his request that way. _Do it for me..._ It's not like Jimmy would ever go so far for him. Brady's looking a bit like dying inside when Jimmy decides to speak and turns Brady's whole world on its head.

Jimmy gives him a lopsided smile and then stands up.

"Okay. I'm very tired but I'm doing this for you. You owe me."

Brady grins and moves up so he can stand on his full height on Jimmy's bed, he proceeds to bounce.

"Hey! What kind of hooligan are you!? Didn't your mother ever tell you - no jumping on the bed?" Jimmy looks genuinely concerned and he is reaching out either to steady Brady or yank his arms.

"Yeah she did and she ain't here right now, is she?" Brady answers back easily and carelessly continues with his freestyle jumping. Then he grins before jumping at Jimmy.

"Brady!"

 

*

 

They land loud and strong on the carpet - Jimmy under Brady and he's wincing when he lets out an airless laugh. "Christ! Brady should I remind you that you're not a child."

Brady's mischief has left him and now laying on top of Jimmy, nose to nose with him, he's having a bit of a moral crisis. Because if he just moved a little closer, pushed his cheek to the side then --

"Bray? You okay?" Jimmy reaches up and shakes him a little by the shoulder. "What're you thinking?"

Brady swallows -- "I'm thinking that I am comfortable right here. And I don't want to move." Part of him is dead serious but he tries to keep his voice light to mask his inner turmoil.

"You wanted to go out, right? You made me get up to go bar hopping with you and the guys. So, get up so we can get ready."

He knows that Jimmy's right, he knows he set himself up for this argument...Brady smacks his forehead lightly on Jimmy's shoulder and exhales before getting up and reaching out.

Jimmy takes his hands and lets himself be pulled up to stand.

Face to face -- Brady offers a goofy smile.

Jimmy looks down at the floor and shakes his head before he shoves at his friend's shoulder lightly as if to say -- get ready. Then he walks past him to go to the bathroom and freshen up.

Left alone in Jimmy's room, Brady inhales and runs his fingers through his hair. "What are you doing, man..." He asks himself this as he takes a step and faceplants into Jimmy's bed once more, closing his eyes, refusing to acknowledge the inevitable.


	7. No surprises

Jimmy doesn't remember who made what suggestion but after bar hopping they end up in a mutual acquaintance's home. Now, the place is as fancy as they come - complete with a terrifyingly beautiful view of Manhattan and he ends up nursing a beer at the balcony, taking time to appreciate the situation. The night's going to rage on no matter what he does, socializing can wait.

It's Kevin that eventually finds him out there and like always, he holds on to Jimmy and hooks his chin over one broad shoulder.

"What are you thinking about, Jimbo? The ladies are in there and you are out here. My brain cannot compute that. You're from Harvard, help me out here. You gotta tell me!"

The Harvard chides are slowly losing their bite and as time goes by he finds it less amusing and more tedious. But this is Kevin. Jimmy will always make allowances for him no matter what. In his mind, a more wax poetic place, Jimmy thinks that he and Kevin have been friends since before they were born. The fact that they were born in the same hospital, that at one point their mothers passed on another in the halls, heavily pregnant with them, that the meeting came and went, a womb to tomb kind of friendship.

"Look at this view, Kev. Let me appreciate this. We're from Boston, sure. But just look at this." Jimmy gestures to the lights, the beautiful unapologetic lights of the city. Kevin looks on and moves his arms to wrap around Jimmy's shoulders. "We've gone far, haven't we?" Kevin quietly acquiesces. Jimmy silently nods.

But the magic is fleeting - and just as quickly as it came - it is broken.

"Kevin! Come over here because Stacey's FaceTiming Johnny!"

 

=

 

Jimmy tries not to mourn the loss of Kevin beside him, but he also knows that Kevin misses Johnny Gaudreau and any chance of talking to him is a welcome thing. As Kevin leaves, Jimmy takes a long swig of his beer and sighs.

"Not too cold out, yeah? Perfect party weather." Brady walks out and closes the glass door behind him and offers Jimmy his drink - which is an innocently straightforward Jack 'n Coke. Jimmy refuses and smiles at his roommate. "Not really feeling the EDM and nudity inside?" Jimmy asks Brady, gesturing to a few ladies inside enjoying their youth and freedom by showing off choice body parts. 

Brady shakes his head and gives Jimmy a look - could ask you the same question.

Jimmy laughs at that and knocks his bottle against Brady's glass.

"Saw you and Kevin talking looks like it was more serious than party material. Everything okay?"

Before Jimmy can answer the question, the glass door opens and Kevin walks out and immediately latches on to Jimmy. "We're going to Mika's house next, then at Stacey's. Let's go! Jim! Brady!" Kevin looks excited and Jimmy knows it's because Stacey's a trusted friend and companion. That Kevin likes her a little bit more than he should and that she does like him back, they're slowly but surely moving into that exclusive territory that Jimmy knows all too well - having seen it before - another lifetime, another girl.

Brady gives Jimmy a smile that says he's not hoping for an answer to his question. He moves to follow Kevin, but Jimmy holds his ground.

"I'm heading back. Tell Mika'll I'll bug him next time. I'm beat so I'm heading back home."

"It's eleven-thirty what the hell are you talking about? Tired my ass." Kevin says disbelieving as Brady looks on.

"And I had a really tiring day. Go. Have fun and all that." Jimmy tries to give him that big crooked smile.

"Are you sure? Like really, really sure?" Kevin pleads, sidling up to Jimmy. And in turn Jimmy nudges him towards the door. "I'm sure. Now, go."

 

=

 

Jimmy watches his friends walk out and the owner of the house calls out to him before she leaves with the rest of them - "Jimmy, it's on auto-lock so when you leave just shut the door behind you and punch in the code i JUST texted you then it'll kick into alarm mode, okay? No hurry and see you next time!" She waves at him and leaves with the rest of them.

 

=

 

Jimmy does take his time, maybe another fifteen minutes, looking out into the vast and ridiculous sea of buildings and wondering why he just can't be happy for the people in his life. Why there is this gnawing pain at the edges of his consciousness. He doesn't find the answer at the bottom of his beer bottle or in the complicated New York evening. 

 

=

 

He remembers hanging his coat by the entryway - a walk in cove that houses multiple rows of gun metal coat hangers - so after putting his empty beer bottle in the recycling bin, he makes it his mission to retrieve his coat and head home. 

As soon as he walks into the cove, he startles to see Brady rifling through the coats, Jimmy just stares at him a bit flabbergasted.

"Hey!"

"I thought you left."

"I uh...forgot my coat and then I saw you there so I decided to just hang back. Also, my coat. Can't find it."

"It's this one. You put it next to mine." Jimmy says and hands him the coat. Brady gratefully takes it and when he reaches for it, their fingers touch. Jimmy is aware that Brady is aware. They don't move.

Jimmy startles yet again when Brady hooks his pointer with Jimmy's.

"I though you left, Brady."

"I came back."

Their fingers twine tighter.

And it might be the weird weekend or the weariness, that bone-deep exhaustion that comes with being a professional athlete and adult - Jimmy can't know, really. Not right now. Because Brady's moving closer, determined and alive. Jimmy surrenders to the embrace and closes his eyes when Brady puts his mouth against his. 

Brady's smiling, encouraging and makes a knee-weakening noise when Jimmy grants him permission to slide his tongue against his.

There is triumph there, but Jimmy is devastated as he reciprocates and reciprocates.

They break for air and Brady reaches to hold Jimmy by the side of his neck, so they are forced to look at each other eye to eye.

"Let's go home, Jimmy. Let's just go home."

 

=

 

And what can Jimmy really say to that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for taking a while to update. Life's a roller coaster for me recently and it's only now that I'm finding time to actually sit down and write. Real life gets in the way of fun. All the time.

**Author's Note:**

> Title of the series is from the U2 song "All I Want Is You" -- if you've not seen this song performed live at the Slane Castle concert, please Youtube it. It's not a waste of your time!


End file.
